Kombucha seems to have some staying power compared to other health-food beverages. Compared to other crazy drinks it actually tastes good and has active bacteria and fungi that might be healthful but definitely make you shit regularly. If you clicked this post you probably like kombucha. And, if you like kombucha then you also know it is expensive. Making kombucha is like making $50 per hour and it's super easy.
Sarah got hooked on kombucha a couple years ago. I started noticing squat bottles with new-age labels filling the recycling bin. That’s cool. I only noticed because it meant I could fit half as many beer bottles before emptying the bin. However when I walked past the cold drink case at Whole Foods (yes on the way to the beer cooler) I noticed kombucha was $4-6 per bottle. Hell no. I came home and said- “I'm a scientist! I sure as shit can grow bacteria!” In fact, she and I both can, as evidenced by the first project we ever did together. We combined buttermilk and moss in a blender and spread it on clay pots in an attempt to create beautifully mossy Christmas presents. Instead grew a putrid aquarium of mold…I digress...story for another time
My frugal focus kicked in and my first thought was we don’t need that crap. I had not tasted it but was skeptical of its value - health, flavor, or otherwise. But Sarah liked it so I grabbed some beer (yes I see the hypocrisy) and went home. A quick search online and my skepticism turned to irritation when I realized for $6 bucks we were buying old iced tea.
Kombucha is fizzy fermented black tea. Since tea doesn’t have any natural sugar (necessary for fermentation) you add sugar or fruit to get things bubbling. The fermentation happens thanks to a bunch of microorganisms. A couple recipes made clear this was not a difficult or expensive process. No special equipment or ingredients. I do not have the patience to brew my own beer and have been too cheap to invest in all the tubes, carboys, funnels, and other crap I have seen in my friends’ garages. But I could brew some kombucha.
I poked around online and experimented for a while making some decent and some terrible kombucha that Sarah graciously consumed. Then my brother started brewing kombucha and got it refined to a weekly 20 minute process. It works, I follow it, and now we have good, virtually free kombucha all the time.
The first thing you need is a scoby. This is a mat of microorganisms that ferment the tea and make the kombucha. You can make your own, I have, or you can buy them online, or get one from a friend who also makes kombucha. Once you mention your new hobby at a party you will find lots of people say “oh yeah I do that”. Ask those weirdos for a scoby.
For this post I am going to assume you found a scoby somewhere and are ready to make some cheap kombucha.
Gather your supplies and ingredients:
8 - cheap black tea bags
1 - cup of white sugar
Some ginger
2 - half gallon mason jars with lid rings
6 - but preferably 12 resealable bottles. I use these.
Funnel
Ladle
Make the tea:
Clean your jars and boil about 8 cups of water. Some folks swear it needs to be filtered. My tap water seems to work fine. Add your tea bags to the boiling water and take it off the heat. After 8 minutes remove the tea bags and stir in the sugar. Split the tea evenly between your two mason jars then top them off with cool water leaving an inch or two of space. When the liquid is room temperature add a scoby or piece of scoby to each jar. Place a piece of paper towel or napkin over the opening and screw it in place with the metal ring. Wait 7 days.
Bottle for second fermentation:
After 7 days you will have slightly carbonated plain tea flavored kombucha. You can ferment it more or less than 7 days depending on if you like it more or less vinegary. You can drink this if you like it or make it better with a second fermentation.
Clean 6 resealable bottles. Cut ginger into matchsticks and put a few in each bottle for ginger flavored kombucha. You can add slivers of apple or cherry or other fruit, in addition to ginger, for more flavor. Don’t go crazy. Two cherries or a couple grams of apple per bottle is all you need. Fish out the scobies from the mason jars and put them in a bowl with some of the liquid to cover and keep them happy while you work. Use your funnel to help pour or ladle the tea from the jars into the bottles. Leave an inch of space, seal the tops, and leave at room temperature for 2 days or so. Taste your kombucha to be sure it is carbonated enough and if so place it in the refrigerator. If not leave it out a bit longer then chill and enjoy.
So what about that $50 per hour? Kombucha runs a few bucks per bottle. The average on amazon for 6 or 12 packs is about 0.20 per ounce. Individual bottles from a store are more. In any case, at 0.20 per ounce the 128 ounces you just made could be valued at $25.60. Time invested is about half an hour and the cost per batch (once you have the jars and bottles) is 8 tea bags (Lipton teabags are 3 cents each) and less than $1 of sugar. Money in the bank or at least not in the recycling bin.
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